In the past week I\’ve driven my moped and car, as well as taken planes, city buses, commercial buses, shuttles, subways, commuter trains, light rails, and a ferry. I\’ve slept on couches, stinky buses, sticky trains,and station floors, and spent the night in half star motels, relatives homes, and four star luxury business hotels. My head is swimming.
There is no class status, only people, and everywhere there are assholes and clueless fucks. Jersey, Long Island, DC, Virginia, Maryland, Delaware, Florida, Manhattan… what\’s the common denominator? Malls and SUVs. Chain stores and traffic congestion. Cell phones and angry commuters. Crowded streets that smell of piss from some sort of primate, and way too much focus on media disaster coverage of the latest problem facing the US (Kerry! Bush! Jeanne! Ivan! Beheadings! Only one day left at the Macy\’s One Day Sale with a preview day on Friday!).
I\’m not agoraphobic, just misanthropic. Human beings make we want to puke. Less than ten days until I\’m on another plane, this time to Scotland. Wegies, schemies, and New Towners… Jamie, can we just fuck off to Inverness and stare at the sky for a few days? I need a holiday without the sun, a little rain on my pride parade, and a big love from a furry man in a kilt. We\’ll pick up some Hedonism and hit the Highlands. I\’ll buy a house in the Hebrides and we can raise sheep and turn sod for a living. Dogs and cattle and whiskey, that sounds like the life for me.