\”Sometimes it\’s not who you are, sometimes its who you know… D.C., D.C. destroys\” sing the Boils.
I have to admit that it\’s true, especially in this city, but never the less, I fucking love this town.
In a city full of politicians, everyone\’s got a stick up their butt about something. You\’re either too liberal, too conservative, or not liberal or conservative enough. Whether your social circle is Capitol Hill, the Georgetown elite or the Takoma Park hippies, you\’re never good enough for the people you know. Yeah, it\’s a tough break, but it makes you work your ass off for whatever you want. You either get eaten alive, or you flip that middle finger out and wag it two inches from everyone\’s face; the only thing that gives you any credibility in this town is your attitude.
It\’s not who you are, where you come from, what you want or where you\’re going. It\’s about how strong you can be, about how much shit you can take, about how much you can get away with. It\’s all about pushing the limits of whatever doctrine you buy into, and in this city, no matter what your beliefs, you buy. There are no objective people here; everyone\’s got a strong set of beliefs and a very opinionated outlook, and they\’re not afraid to tell you just what it is they think and feel.
From the gutters to the White House, everyone\’s trying to get theirs. In a city of hostile strangers, everyone has one common goal: me and mine. Alliances last as long as they are beneficial to all parties involved, and true friendships are hard to come by, but when they happen, they happen for a life time.
Family ties hold people in the rest of the country, but not here. Going back to the Civil War when brother fought against brother, people are still struggling against their very essence, fighting against social mores, opinions, the population, the law, and their own consciences, just to get what they want, when they want it.
This is a city full of people who were never cool enough for New York or Los Angeles, but were too smart to live in the midwest. This is a city full of people who want to change the world, but aren\’t even happy at home. This is a city full of people with independence, ambition and loud voices. Very, very loud voices. But that doesn\’t mean anyone is listening.
This is a city with the largest national zoo in the world, though most of the zoo is devoted to Rock Creek park, and not the wildlife. This is also a city with the fourth worst traffic congestion in the country, and in the top five cities for air pollution. This is a city where tax dollars are reaped from people unrepresented in Congress.
No where else in the world can you shoot up heroin within eye sight of the world\’s most dominating government buildings. No where else can you buy a shirt with a picture of a marijuana plant and a caption that reads \”keep off the grass\” on the very lawn of where the leader of the free world lives. No where else can you ride the subway sandwiched between a congressman and a homeless person.
It\’s a city of contradictions, a city of diversity, a city of self serving individuals. Don\’t let anyone fool you; even the most well meaning vegan no-nukes environmental and human rights activist has skeletons in the closet. Even that activist goes home and fights with his fellow activists about who\’s fucking who and who said what and who\’s more hardcore than the next person. Everyone\’s flawed. Everyone\’s got a major void in their lives. Everyone\’s searching, though most don\’t even know what they\’re searching for.
I love this city; it\’s in my blood. The contradictions, the random glimpses of beauty in the most unexpected places. The strong sense of community, but with every community filled with inner conflict. The pettiness, the self-centeredness, the ambition to change the world. The talent, the intelligence, the diversity.
I\’ve never found another place with so many people who are dually obsessed with themselves and the state of the world. I\’ve never found another place with such active artistic and political scenes. I\’ve never found another place with so many well rounded people. I\’ve never found another place with so much to offer, and so much to take advantage of. I\’ve never found another place that made me want to scream and laugh and smile and cry and vomit and dance and create and destroy all at once. I\’ve never found another place that\’s gotten so far under my skin.
I belong here, among all these fucked up, two-faced busy bodies. It\’s a city full of people who never quite fit in with anyone, even the misfits. It\’s a city where I belong, to nothing, and to everything.
I\’ve never found another place that has felt so utterly like home.
D.C. destroys, and I\’m going to let it. That\’s part of what this city is, and this city is a part of what I am, full of contradictions, ambition, beauty, disease, neglect, creativity and purpose: to destroy, with some positive damage.