It makes me feel like I have been a very naughty child. Sitting at the allergist today in the little black plastic chair as my doctor lectured me for not having called 911. Emphasizing how lucky I was that my mother came home and carted me off to the emergency room when she did.
How many times have the doctors shaken their heads at me in amazement and said how lucky I was to be alive? How many times have I agreed to be more careful, only to look health problems in the eye and say to them, no, this is normal and I\’m going to ignore you?
It\’s not really my fault. Oh sure, my lack of monitoring myself properly is, but I\’ve never been good at gauging opinions, levels, results, or outcomes. My decision making, particularly in regards to my own health, is, admittedly, still bordering on the \’atrocious\’ side. But it\’s not like I\’m out shooting up or boozing out or any nonsense like that. I\’ve erroneously put my life in the care of some very poor medical establishments. They\’re certified, my health insurance told me to go see them, and then I end up getting an overdose of my medication in their offices, am left unmonitored, and am sent home to see what will happen on my own. Their carelessness that has landed me in the hospital more than once is not something they will take responsibility for, so apparently, the fault must lie with me.
I contend that if you\’re shooting me full of more than two dozen substances which I am deathly allergic to — which I have a history of putting in the hospital due to direct exposure in the past — then you should be held at least somewhat responsible for the negative outcome which may result. I\’m willing to concede that I am more than a little reckless in ignoring my symptoms and trying to soldier through, but I think \’medical malpractice,\’ and \’manslaughter by negligence\’ are things other people should be thinking about, too. Losing one\’s job (the nurses), losing one\’s license (the doctors), accidentally causing the death of a patient, or having an entire practice or clinic shut down is serious to all parties involved. I might not go to those offices any longer, but what about the next patient who does whom they fuck up with?
Medicine. Law. Government. These things are getting so intricately tied. For better or worse? Public healthcare is a good idea, but since I\’ve been on it, I\’ve been almost killed twice. I know it could be better if it was better monitored, received more money, and people other than the poor, old, and dying were using it (no money, no advocates), but at the moment, the system is a mess. Universal healthcare? Not until you can get the public healthcare you\’ve got to stop providing such lousy service.
