The social security office called to start the SSI application process today. If they approve me I will receive $545 a month, plus free health care and medicine! That is $545 I do not have now, and I have lived on less even on my own with a lease in my name. Of course, it might be a full year before they approve me… but hey, at least step one is accomplished.
In other news, my psychiatrist is the bees knees. I have never had one that I actually liked, or who made the least bit effort to get to know me. She is doing independent research on the combination of fibromyalgia and bi polar II (it would be easier if I had bi polar I), and has been going out of her way to explore every medication option with me.
Maybe because it is due to the fact that I am terribly vain, or maybe it is just because my anti-psychotics made me gain 50 pounds in two months and made me obese, but whatever my motivations, my shrink and I have decided to start me on Topamax over Tegretol, Depakote, as there is weight loss instead of weight gain association with Topamax, versus other mood stabilizers and anti-convulsants that work as mood stabilizers.
There are other risks with Topamax, such as kideny failure and glaucoma, but Risperdal and Zyprexa have similar potential side effects and I have been fine on those for eighteen months. The only other concern is that one of the most common side effects of Topamax is cognitive and memory impairment, and as I already have enough problems with that – it is also a side effect of fibromyalgia, imagine that – there is the risk that it might increase in me. So everybody keep an eye on me; if I seem more flighty and forgetful lately, let me know, as I may not notice.
I am already feeling those symptoms now, forgetting how to use the lj-cut tag, adding letters where there should be none, confusing words, leaving out entire words – an almost normal day. It is slightly worse than usual, which I am attributing to only three hours of sleep last night, so I am off to take a nap.