My psychiatrist just started me on Geodon today.
It\’s an anti-psychotic for schizophrenia but was approved by the FDA (versus just off-label use) for bipolar mixed and manic episodes.
Bipolar mixed episodes?! I wouldn\’t know shit about that, right? says my over-charged bank account, my over-sexed genitals, my under-fed stomach, my racing mind, my recent speeding ticket, etc. etc. etc. no no no, everything is just FINE HERE.
I love pharmacology. Take this, feel better in a week…that is if I don\’t react the way I did with Lamictal and suddenly flip out and decide to kill myself out of the blue. Aren\’t those 1% chance drug reactions the best when you just happen to fall into the one percent who suddenly decides that suicidal ideation is a beautiful thing? Why can\’t I just get headaches like the other 34% of the control group? Jesus.
It\’s okay, it\’s okay, I\’ll feel better in a few days and then I\’ll be back on the right path. Whatever that is. Still no idea where it\’s heading. I\’m on the road to nowhere, baby, and my brakes are softer than my boobs.
From the site: Do not drink alcohol such as beer, wine, or hard liquor while on GEODON. Heh. Something like four of my medications come with that warning. That might be why some days I am able to down eight drinks in five hours without a problem, and other days get buzzed off my ass from just two beers. Oh man. I remember back when I tried that whole \”I can\’t drink because of the medications I\’m on\” routine. Yeah. Tried that a few times. Can see how well that turned out. Only way to keep me from drinking is to not go where people are drinking, which thereby eliminates the vast majority of my social circle as most of them drink at home, too. I knew I should have gone the whole frumpy-suburban-soccer-mom route when I had the chance!
edit 3:10pm: oh yeah. When I got back from Oz in August, I wore a US size 12 or so. Now I fit into a size 6 or 7, which means none of my wardrobe fits. Zilch. This could be contributing to the Artful Dodger look. What\’s changed? Been off the hormonal birth control for five months now; longest time since I went on it when I was 13. 11 years of The Pill, The Patch, and The Ring — now there\’s a trilogy of nasties. When I first met the Chief three years ago I weighed 160; back then he said if I lost anymore weight I\’d look like a skeleton. Now I\’m down to 125; he just noticed last week or so. Dr Gonzo complains that I don\’t look like a girl anymore. My ghetto booty is lost. I\’m too poor to buy clothes that fit. Maybe I\’ll join a nudist colony. Damn, trouble is so into me.